oh no!

The moment I have been dreading... has finally arrived. :( My knee popped out of place again. And I am in need of surgery. I have known for a while that I would eventually need to have the surgery since my knee has been popping out of place since I was 12 years old but I've been putting it off for many reasons. anyhow this time it popped out for no reason so now i know that i cannot put it off any longer. If I had been holding Claire or something when it happened she could have been seriously hurt and I am not willing to take that chance. so I've set my first doctors appointment. I am going to get it taken care of right away. AND the wonderful news is that my mom is going to come and help me with taking care of the baby because I wont be able to move around for a while. Cant wait to finally get this problem fixed.

CRAZY!

I swear, in this life you can make all the plans you want... but life rarely ends up going the way you plan. On the one hand I have a wonderful husband and baby girl and family and friends.. so many things to be grateful for. but there are indeed somethings that I wish were a little different. somethings that were definitely not suppose to be the way they are. I've made a few new friends here.. but i really miss my old ones. I've come to the conclusion that although you will make many friends in life, there are some people that leave such an impression on your heart that you will never replace or forget them. I am very grateful to be here in Portland with my hubby and baby girl. its definitely been an adventure so far and a real growing experience.

A wonderful visit from my parents!

This past weekend was so amazing, so many things happened. My parents came for a visit, Chace and I celebrated our 2 year anniversary and Claire had her first taste of rice cereal! All and all it was a very good weekend. I love my parents I am excited for there next visit. I love my husband and I am so excited to celebrate many many more years together. And I love my baby girl and all the joy that she adds to this home.

Chace and I have had so much fun putting our new place together. We are so excited to have each other. Being here in Oregon is only making us a stronger family. At the moment I feel like our marriage could stand strong through anything that comes our way.
Life is good.
xo
Kelsie

New home, New job, New life...

Everything is new. New surroundings, New people, New home, New job... Everything. I cant even go somewhere without using my navigation system to get around. I love oregon. I love my new job. I love all that chace and I have here... but this week I'm missing home. I miss home all the time but this week more than usual. maybe that's because I'm sick so we've stayed in all week. but its times like this when id go to my moms, curl up on the couch and watch movies with her. movies that only my mom and i like. stupid chick flicks. I found myself turning on my wii just to see the mii we had created for my mom. Also, my parents were suppose to be visiting right now.. but because we were all so sick they ended up not coming. They are coming in a couple weeks. hopefully I can last that long. Its hard being away. but i guess thats something i need to get use to.

finally...

I am so excited! We are finally getting on a good schedule here in Oregon. the move kinda messed a lot of things up. especially with Claire's sleeping habits. We moved and all the sudden she forgot how to sleep at night! it was like I had just brought her home from the hospital again! but all is well now. She is sleeping. and that makes this mommy very very happy. Not having my mommy to lean on is pretty hard.. but it is really strengthening mine and Chace's marriage. I realize now that at times when I probably should have been going to my husband I was going to my mommy. She is my best friend. my mother and I are really very close and I feel like she knows everything. and really going to here first is what I have been doing my whole life. BUT I am married. I need to rely on my dear sweet husband more. now that we are so far away its forcing me to rely on him more... and its really quite awesome. It really has done a lot for us. I know that this is where we are suppose to be. Because I could have NEVER forced myself to stop going to my mother for everything. I love going to her. I love her advice. I love her opinion. and i love her. I still get her input over the phone from time to time. and I miss her like crazy... but this is good. life is good. I'm learning to trust my husband more with day to day things. I will never stop missing my mom. And when the time comes I will be excited to live near her again. but chace and I have a lot of work to do on our selfs. and I am excited to do it. I am excited to grow. be our own couple and learn even more about each other. I really think that what we are going through right now as a couple and as a family unit would be a good experience for anyone who lives close to there family. It's like we're newly weds all over again. the dynamics have changed... but for the better. I only hope that my wonderful mother can understand... I hope and I pray that she can be ok with the change. I hope she understands that all of this is only going to make chace and I better and that it is only going to help us grow. and I hope she knows that I miss her.. and my daddy. every second of everyday... stay strong. we will be back soon. I love you.

Claire Claire Claire

I never knew how rewarding being a mother would be. It is honestly sooooo amazing! I never knew how MUCH love I could feel for my own child. Before I had her everyone I know that already had children would say to me "you are going to experience love in a whole new way..." and i believed them but I really did not understand what that ment until I experience it for myself. it is the most amazing feeling.. there is just such a strong connection... I am so happy to do anything and everything for her and i am so proud to be her mother. i am so proud to be a mom. i remember one of the first nights at home.. when it was just the baby, Chace and i.. it was such a trial. so hard. i remember thinking how am i going to get through this?? i have no idea what I'm doing! i was a wreak. i had Hadley slept. i went into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. blood shot eyes, hair a mess, bags under eyes... but i remember thinking to myself... I can do this. I am strong. I am beautiful. I am a mother. and there is no greater feeling in the world. I feel bad for the people who go through life thinking that having children is not for them and that they are better off just taking care of themselves. because this is the most beautiful gift my heavenly father has ever given me. I am so proud to be a mom. and i feel so blessed to have such a beautiful, healthy baby girl.
no words can fully describe how much happiness it gives me.
xo
kelsie

So much fun!

Life here in portland has been amazing so far! Chace has an awesome job, we are now making double what he use to back in utah. the apartment that I am managing is awesome. we love the apartment it self plus the people we work for are really cool. there is always something to do here. it is honestly an awesome and beautiful place to live.
Claire is doing great now. the transition was a little hard for her but now that we are all settled into our new place everything is working out really well. she is amazing. i cant imagine going through life without her. being a mom is the most wonderful experience. its a love more unlike anything i have ever known. Chace and I are so happy. our marriage is only getting stronger. and our friendships with natalie and kilo couldnt be better. they are two of the most amazing people i have ever met. to have a friendship like ours is something that doesnt happen offten. I feel so blessed to have the life that I have. we have been givin so much and this move has been such a wonderful experience thus far. I am so excited to have the things that I have and I am so excited for the future. life is good.
xoxo
kc